It’s almost 3 months since I (she) broke up with her (me). It would be an understatement to say that I struggled. It was tougher than the next five struggled I had in life combined. It’s like being unemployed, mistreated, sleeping on a wet bed with bad dreams, and then made to run, battling pain in every part of my body.

There have been some patterns to my struggles. Weird. But I want to talk about them.

First one is inertia. There have been hours I haven’t left the bathtub thinking why it happened and what’s worthwhile to do coming…

You came in my dream yesterday
Looking as resplendent as ever

You asked how I have been doing
Truth would been a bit long so I said fine

“How is…

It’s been ages
Now you get mentioned
I stand as if nothing happened

I look inside my heart
No trace of you
As if you were never there

But ever defiant memories
What do I do of them
They seem to never learn

Holding on to me
Like you used to
But not leaving me like you did

It’s just a day between Monday and Friday
A day I used to barely notice
But it’s different now

First few days of week I can manage
Last few I don’t know how I do
It’s the Wednesday I struggle

I wake up late and sleep more to keep it short
Thinking you can’t hurt me in sleep
Even if you can it doesn’t count

Even then it somehow never fails to punish me
My will is depleted enough that I struggle
It’s high enough that I still fight

I wish Wednesday goes back to being boring
A day between Monday and Friday
That no one counts or care

I have been holding on to an old phone model from very long. Pixel 2 was released in 2017, and I have been constantly postponing this decision. To make it worse, I specially bought Pixel Buds because talking on this phone was so painful. Often person on the other side can’t hear me talk at all.

But hey, I like to hold on to things. I still hear same kind of music I used to 10 years ago. I still enjoy same kind of food and sports. …

In the summer of 2016, I wrote in my journal that I am struggling badly in life, and I need a guiding angel. Despite trying sincerely hard, I wasn’t getting satisfaction from work and not making progress toward what I wanted from life. I was in desperate need of magic.

Enters a person who told me you deserve better things in life. If you don’t let go of wrong things in life, how will you attract the right things! I didn’t believe it at first but what option did I have. I was anyway not doing great.

I started giving…

Reality I can bear
It’s the imagination that torments

Future I can tolerate
It’s the flashback that excruciates

Days I can hold on
It’s the night that shatters

Distance I can manage
It’s the difference that hurts

You and I can survive
It’s the possibility of we that kills

Source — TOI (Sorry, I couldn’t find a better pic anywhere, and that’s a big shame, because Chole Bhature deserves a much better picture and more importantly glory!)

On the doomsday, when everything would be put to justice, the world would realize the contribution of Chole Bhature to the progress of mankind.

A long, long time ago lived a famous mathematician in India Aryabhatta who was a big-time foodie. Confused by the subjectivity of taste and decision overload of what to eat every day, he decided to rate the food and only focus on the top ten percentile. So every day for straight thirty days he gave a numeric rating to different food items. At that time, there was no concept of zero, so he rated using the…

The debate between the book and film adaption has been for long. I would obviously lean toward book’s side. Books have fared way better in giving you a peek into the narrator's point of view and pulling into the world created by the merger of the writer’s depiction and reader’s perception. But not this time.

I just finished “The Fault in our Stars”, in an attempt to be all prepared for the final movie of Sushant Singh Rajput — Dil Bechara, which is based on an adaptation of this novel. I am all rooting for “Dil Bechara” to be better…

There is something about knowing that it’s the last time you are doing what you are doing. Every damn thing starting from zoom breakout rooms to case preparation becomes more interesting. You want to notice every detail and perhaps hold on to it for as long as possible. Even poor jokes seem funny. Our professor in an accounting class asked what’s ‘Fs and Us’? With excitement and smile, I said Favorable and Unfavourable variance. And professor quipped, that’s not the first thing that comes to mind when someone says Fs and Us, and we all laughed like anything.

Yesterday, to…

Ajitesh Abhishek

Product Manager at Google | Runner | Loves writing | Personal Blog-

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